I've got to say, I don't know how single moms do this; I spend all day and all night with the little pooper at my side, and it's tough.
It was quite a transition, to go from Chris being with me 24/7, getting on each other's nerves, to him being completely gone, and all the responsibility for Vaughn to be on my shoulders, not to mention finding the time and inclination to dress/shower/feed myself. There were some breakdowns (most notably the first night I was alone with the little guy), and I questioned my abilities to make sure this helpless little thing was getting what he needed, felt bad that he was stuck with such an awkward parent as myself, and kept repeating over and over to myself and to anyone that would listen how hard this was.
But as of today (the second day of a relatively good sleep at night: 10 pm - 3 am / 4 am - 7:30 am...to die for!), I've come to understand that this period of intense immersion in all things Vaughn has been good for me.
I'm gaining confidence as a mom.
I'm beginning to figure out what he wants, and how his natural rhythms flow. I've discovered that at exactly an hour and a half after he wakes up from a nap (give or take 2 - 3 minutes, literally), he needs another nap, and during that nap, I have 60 - 90 minutes to get things done. (I'm not quite mastering the cloth diapering, but there's an improvement), that, by 1 pm, he wants to sleep longer, and that, by 6 pm, he wants to stay up and be cranky.
I'm figuring out that when he's cranky at other times "for no reason", there's often a bubble that needs to come out, and also that he's an aggressive snuggler - he will leave no cranny left unsnuggled! If I want him to have a longer nap, I just need to make him nap on me.
And I'm discovering that he has the cutest, most radiant, heart-melting smile that makes the past 7 weeks all worthwhile (still to be properly captured on camera; the below shot's a bit goofy)...and I'm learning how to coax it out of him.
So, in my "spare time", I've managed to do a few loads of laundry, keep the bedroom clean, eat 3 times a day, thanks in part to very generous friends who have brought me food or invited me over for dinner, and I also managed to watch the 6th season of the Family Guy.
Like my little Huffalump, it's freakin' sweet.